Leadership/Parenting Tip: Getting the best out of those we lead

Most of us are guilty of it at some point or another ...

"I've told you not to put it there a thousand times."

"How many times have I said not to eat on the sofa?

"I told you again and again that you'd struggle to pass your exams if you didn't revise."

We badly want our children/team members to succeed and on the surface, we understand that the more patient our approach when things go wrong, the better our level of rapport with those we lead, but:

Surely there are times when 'saying it how it is' is not only acceptable, but advisable? I'm afraid not! 

Whether we like it or not, people largely behave according to the identity they hold for themselves and that identity is greatly influenced by who they perceive as their leaders. If you encourage your children/team members to believe that they always forget what you say and/or they never listen to you, they're more likely to live up to that behaviour rather than avoid it, regardless of the punishments waiting for them. But if you encourage them to believe that they're better than the behaviour they exhibit and that you're actually surprised by it (whether it's truly what you believe or not), you subtly influence their subconciousness to want to achieve better and to also believe that it's possible.  

"I've told you not to put it there a thousand times."

"I'm surprised you've put it there because I've mentioned it a few times now and you're a good listener."

"How many times have I said not to eat on the sofa?"

"Considering that you're so switched on as a person, I'm both annoyed and surprised that you're eating on the sofa when I've asked you not to."

"I told you again and again that you'd struggle to pass your exams if you didn't revise."

"At the moment, I'm gutted for you that you didn't pass. I know you're better than the mark you achieved and I've no doubt that you'd have secured a much better mark had you revised more than you did."


Final Thought: 

If you pride yourself on being a straight-talking leader, think before you talk and ask yourself:

1) Is my straight-talking linked to my need for an ego boost?

2) How do others feel when I 'say it how it is'?

3)  Is my straight-talking the wisest psychological response to this issue? Or a knee-jerk reaction born out of my annoyance?

Available now on iTunes & Amazon: The Impact Code - Unlocking Resilience, Productivity & Influence http://goo.gl/MFq3oE

Call me - 0121 420 3457 / 07760 444 946
Email me - enquiries@impactlife.co.uk
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Connect with me on twitter - www.twitter.com/andrewpain1974
Check out my website - www.impactlife.co.uk

What's The Impact Code about?

The Impact Code is not a book about goal-setting, being passionate and living the dream. You can already find lots of those.

The Impact Code isn't a long and wordy book, which takes you a month to read but six months later you can only remember one or two of its key points. You can find lots of those too.

The Impact Code is a book which gives 24 memorable insights to develop your resilience, productivity and influence, so you're equipped to make a lasting impact on the world around you. Whether you're a business leader, a team manager, an entrepreneur, a parent, an aspiring professional or young person, your ability to make an impact will define how successful you become and how happy you feel. Imagine how your life would be if you could:

• Attract more people to follow you - out of choice not obligation
• Bounce back quickly from your disappointments & set-backs
• Overcome your fears and live beyond your current horizons
• Achieve more without adding to your overstretched 'to-do' list

Choose to make an awesome impact in your world or don't - it's up to you!

Grab your digital or paperback version via Amazon at: http://goo.gl/619iE4

Call me - 0121 420 3457 / 07760 444 946
Email me - enquiries@impactlife.co.uk
Connect with me on Linkedin - http://www.linkedin.com/in/andrewpain
Connect with me on Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/ImpactLifeUK
Connect with me on twitter - www.twitter.com/andrewpain1974
Check out my website - www.impactlife.co.uk

Cracking The Impact Code - It's easier than you think

Some people do it on their deathbeds, others as they see in the New Year or relax on holiday but all of us do it at some point. We ask ourselves:

Is my life a success?

Am I happy with how things have turned out?

Am I doing well in spite of the challenges I face?

Our answers will depend on one vital piece of information: the extent of our impact on the people and experiences of our lives.

We can't all be the next Steve Jobs but we all want to make our mark and leave a legacy that's valued by our loved ones, work place and community, and our need to make an impact runs deep. When you believe you contributed to the development of someone or something (however small or big), you feel inspired and alive. But when you feel your impact is lacking, the road to self-doubt can be surprisingly quick, even for positive people, and before we know it, we can see ourselves as ineffective victims living in an unfair world.

'The Impact Code - Unlocking Resilience, Productivity and Influence' gives 24 powerful insights to develop your resilience, productivity and influence, so you're equipped to make your mark. Each one is written in a style, which is easy to access and apply so whether it's New Year's Eve, a summer holiday or just another day, choose to make an awesome impact in your world and grab your copy of The Impact Code.

Available now on on iTunes and Amazon in digital & paperback: http://goo.gl/619iE4

Call me - 0121 420 3457 / 07760 444 946

Email me - enquiries@impactlife.co.uk

Connect with me on Linkedin - http://www.linkedin.com/in/andrewpain
Like me on Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/ImpactLifeUK

Follow me on twitter - www.twitter.com/andrewpain1974

Check out my website - www.impactlife.co.uk